We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

If Gregg Yeti Doesn't Rejoin the Flashing Astonishers I'm Going To Kill Myself

from Faster Than A Speeding Mullet by Worm Quartet

/

lyrics

Astonishers are Flashing
in The Cuse
They drink and rock and gaze down
At their shoes
Four melancholy marvels
Who kick ass
While lamenting 'bout broken
Stained glass

Now Bob plays Bee Gees covers on weekends
But he still hits stuff like a stuff-hitting God
And Dan Musclow's voice may be kinda whiny
But you can bet your girlfriend's given him and Chuck a hand job

Involuntary Bliss is
What they're on
Their machine doesn't have a
A star on
From OPL to WEFest
They have rocked
But now it looks like everything's
Gonna Stop

Cuz their glasses-wearing weirdo guitarist
Who's known by anyone who's ever read a zine
Has decreased the band's Weezer-lookalikeness
By saying sayonara to the whole fucking scene

If Gregg Yeti doesn't rejoin, I'll kill myself
Make Jello shots with Drano, and kill myself
Slit my wrists with a Triscuit, and kill myself
I'll bathe in battery acid, and kill myself
Shove a high-powered vaccuum hose down my throat, and kill myself
Stick my head in the microwave, and kill myself
Go scuba-diving and bite a shark's cock, and kill myself
Who's gonna find me shows now? I'll kill myself

Dammit...

credits

from Faster Than A Speeding Mullet, released February 28, 2004

license

tags